Night of the Living Trekkies

I know what I like. You know what I like. Zombies. And Science Fiction.

So when this dropped through my letter box:

You can understand that I got a Geek-Semi.

Yes. You read that right. ‘Night of the Living Trekkies’.

Zombies. Star Trek fanboys. Together at last.

It’s written by Kevin David Anderson & Sam Stall and published by Quirk Books, the imprint that gave the world “Pride & Prejudice & Zombies”

After tours of duty in Afghanistan, Jim Pike (if you get that reference, I’m guessing you’re already loading up Amazon in another tab) sleepwalks through life working as an assistant manager in a small Houston hotel. When the Zombie Apocalypse occurs on the same weekend as the hotel hosts its annual Star Trek convention, it’s up to Jim to lead a band of surviving geeks to safety.

I think that we can all agree that this is a story that needs to be told.

Its a tightly plotted story that tears along at a terrific pace, littered with jokes and references to Star Trek, Star Wars and geek culture. If you don’t get one, don’t worry, there’ll be another along in a few lines. Or somebody eating someone’s spleen.

Admittedly, some jokes are overplayed while others are under-explored and there’s some awkward exposition, but there’s so much going on these are minor quibbles.

It’s released on September 1st. Splatter, girls in gold bikinis and some laugh out loud moments. What’s not to like?

It’s like they looked into my brain…


What Sir Patrick Stewart Should Have Said to James Corden At The Glamour Awards

There. A joke for Star Trek fans.

Points must also go to @TheTrappistMonk for his suggestion of “Make it fatso!”

Vulcans – They’re Shit at ‘Rock, Paper, Scissors’

Time Travel – A Beginner’s Guide

So you’ve gone back in time. You’re not sure where, when and who you are.

The first rule is don’t go running around asking everyone what year it is or who the president is. You’ll just end up looking like an idiot. Or a Daily Mail reader. Or both.

The best thing to do is to keep this handy guide with you at all times and the laws of physics will be your bitch:

Add to FacebookAdd to DiggAdd to Del.icio.usAdd to StumbleuponAdd to RedditAdd to BlinklistAdd to TwitterAdd to TechnoratiAdd to Yahoo BuzzAdd to Newsvine

A Self-Important Announcement

Hello. My name’s Dave and I’m a ruthless self-publicist.

While enjoying a few glasses of wine last night, I had an unfeasible idea. I normally have unfeasible ideas after wine, including the Ribbed Tampon and a self-lubricating iPhone screen to avoid the condition of “Tweeter’s Thumb”. But this one I thought I might have a less horrendous chance of fruition. Or lawsuits.

I’ve been questioning the point of this website. In a good way. Don’t get me wrong, I love doing stuff on here simply because I think it’ll make you guys giggle but… well… is their an end to these means? In other words, can this somehow further my career goal to make people wee themselves with laughter for a living and make the Better Half happy?

All these stupid Star Wars / Star Trek /Zombie screenshot sketches I do? I thought they might make a fun “toilet book”. I have shelves full of these things. ‘Great Lies to Tell Small Children’, a book on sheds, naughty street names. They’re great for flicking through while there’s a ‘Disturbance in the Force’.

Now, I have no idea how to go about this. I’m guessing the rights issues are going to be a nightmare. But if I could somehow get rights, I’ve still got tons of ideas that I want to do where I just can’t find the right screenshots.

And then find a publisher.

Difficult – Difficult – Lemon – Difficult.

Anyway, I have made the first tiny step by setting up a new Twitter account named @Dave_Fett

With this account, I’ll post links specifically to the funny sci-fi zombie stuff. The idea being that I’d like to get a nice big chunky following who I can make giggle on a daily basis and then go to people “Look, there’s a market for this shit!”. So, please, if you’re a Tweeter, feel free to follow me by clicking on the link above!

Don’t worry, I’ll still post the usual rambling stuff here and at @ArmyofDave It’ll be business as usual. It’s just that I’ll have a way of organising the stuff better.

Any thoughts?


Dave x

Star Trek / Dr. Who Mash-Up!!!

That joke came from the Better Half.

Yep, she’s Foxy Hot and knows her way around a bad play on words. I’m the luckiest man on Earth…

“Set Co-Ordinates for Threshers. Engage!”

It’s all go in the Army of Dave barracks today so I’ll just leave you with this thought:

Seriously, how many members of the crew need to be off the ship/incapacitated before you leave fucking SCOTTY in charge of the Enterprise?